Paddy texts his wife.
“Mary, I’m just having one more pint with the lads.
If I’m not back in 20 minutes, read this message again.”
* * * * *
We were celebrating the 100th anniversary of our church, and several former pastors and the bishop were in attendance. At one point, our minister had the children gather at the altar for a talk about the importance of the day. He began by asking, “Does anyone know what the bishop does?” There was silence. Finally, one little boy answered gravely, “He’s the one you can move diagonally.”
* * * * *
One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, “Why do we have to learn this pointless information.”
“To save lives.” the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture.
A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. “So how does physics save lives?” he persisted.
“It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school,” replied the professor.
* * * *
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