- I’ve been stuck in traffic so long, even the Sat Nav is asking “Are we there yet?”
- Did you know that 66 percent of teenagers can’t do basic maths? That’s almost half!
- My local chip shop has started using magazines instead of newspapers. I’m currently eating them out of House and Home.
- My mate told me that he thought he was the worst vet in the world. I said, “Don’t put yourself down.”
- I finally got eight hours of sleep. It took me three days, but whatever.