Have you ever left a social gathering feeling drained? Chances are you didn’t get to express yourself authentically. Perhaps you felt you had to make small talk or pretend to be interested in topics that didn’t excite you. Have you ever come away from a meeting feeling frustrated and demoralised? I’ll bet you weren’t given an opportunity to speak, or were shut down when you tried.
On the other hand, have you ever come away from a social gathering or a meeting feeling happy and energised? If so, most likely there were people present who paid attention to what you had to say, while you expressed yourself in a natural, uncensored way.
Being listened to is incredibly energising. It lets us know that we are seen and heard; that we matter and that we’re accepted. As social animals, we crave a sense of belonging, together with confirmation that we are appreciated in our uniqueness. It’s no wonder that ignoring was used as the ultimate punishment by some olden day sects.
Rapt attention is a priceless gift. Those who listen bring life and energy to the speaker and to the conversation. Parents who pay attention to their child as they tell all about their day build their child’s confidence; real confidence that cannot be gained through expensive toys or material things. Strong, meaningful bonds are formed by couples who genuinely listen to one another.
Since being listened to is something we all need, why not make it a habit to actively listen to the people around us? Even when we’re busy, we can take five minutes to pay attention to what a friend, colleague, partner or child is saying. Let them know they matter. Active listening is the greatest gift you can give to another person.
Stephanie Hills ©